A Tribute to Erika

Lives changed, hearts transformed, souls won over for Jesus & life put into perspective is what Erika's legacy has left us with.

It was a week, today, that I was at the hospital watching the doctor's do everything in their power to restore Erika's health.

It was a week, today, that we watched the medical staff walk out of her room, one by one, with tears streaming down their face delivering the news that her fight was over.

It was a week, today, that we spent two hours with her waiting for the paralytic medications to wear off, so they could remove her ventilator. We spent that time worshiping our Lord and Savior, holding her, telling her how much we loved her and how proud we were of her. We told her that it was OK to stop fighting and that she could go Home now. We told her that we would take care of her babies, and Sam too.

It was a week, today, that they were finally able to take her ventilator out. The forty minutes that Erika lived without it felt like a flash before my eyes. I never gave up hope that God could have a Lazarus moment--heal her body or raise her from the dead. As we watched her heart rate slowly decline we clung on a little tighter to her body, not quite ready to let her go. Finally at 3:25PM, her heart beat for one last time and she made her grand entrance into Heaven. Our bodies really are just a home for our spirit, as soon as she was gone, her body looked immediately lifeless.

Throughout Erika's journey with Leukemia and pneumonia there was an undeniable peace in any room that she housed. I can look back on the last nine months and say that the Lord never left our side. He strategically placed people in our lives and even allowed us to witness a few miracles. Erika's life has not only changed our family's, for the better, but 100s of other people.

I was planning on sharing some memories of Erika at her funeral, but I couldn't mustard up the words or would have I been able to contain my composure. So, I wanted to share with you today what my sweet sister-in-law meant to me.

The first time I met Erika was in February of 2003. Josh and I had only been dating for a few months and we were spending the weekend with her & Sam in Chanhassen. Josh & I were attending college in Fargo, so we didn't get to her house until late. Being the great hostess that she was, she whipped up the most amazing Fettuccine Alfredo. Josh & I still talk about it. It was a great weekend getting to know her.

Some of my favorite memories with Erika are going to hip hop dance classes at LifeTime Fitness on Sunday night's, reliving our glory days! (When they lived in the cities). Working out together--going to Carlos State Park and walking the trails, taking our boys on walks, mountain biking and running.

We both loved to shop, I learned a lot from her and was always in awe of the deals she would find and the amount of bags she would bring home. We would say that the Lord knew we needed to be sister-in-laws because we were the exact same size---pants, tops and shoes!! Erika had one of the most giving hearts, she was always giving me her handy-me downs and I was always so thankful. It was fun to be able to share. She would call me when she would get home from a shopping trip and tell me to come over so I could see all of her new treasures! I am really going to miss that. Husband's don't get as excited, nor do they appreciate our fashion shows!

Saturday mornings were typically spent at Caribou Coffee. Mary, Erika & I would spend hours there sharing our hearts, laughing and just enjoying each other's company. As the years went on, our little boys would join us. Sometimes we would spend all morning there, then head to Doolittle's to get our favorite salads and spur the economy at the shops downtown.

When Erika's heart was hurting she was still able to love to the fullest. Josh & I were able to conceive very easily and that was not Erika's experience. I remember when I first found out I was pregnant with Logan, I was really nervous to tell her because I knew of all of the heart ache and procedures she was going through. When I told her she was so excited and never let on too being jealous. She was so gracious to us, hosted a baby shower for us and shared in our excitement and joy. When Logan arrived she would come over to the house a few times a week after work so she could spend time with him. Logan & her had a very special bond. Only auntie Kaka could fix his hurts and her snacks were the very best!

Erika and I were excited to be mom's to our boys. We had fun dreaming about what it would be like when they all got a little older. We both wanted our boys to be close--not just cousins, but best friends. We talked about taking our kids on vacations together, we wanted them to play all of the same sports and we loved dressing them up like "little men!" We wanted to raise our boys to have hearts after our Heavenly Father, to be respectful, hard working, wise, honest, trustworthy and kind. Erika & I always talked about adopting "little Erika's!"

Erika was someone I could trust. I knew I could confide in her and that she would give me honest feedback. I knew she would always be there for me and that she had my back! Erika was one of my prayer warriors!

I loved watching Erika in the kitchen. She was a gourmet cook! I was in awe with her taste buds and how she could throw together a delicious meal at any given moment. She made sure you never left their house hungry!

Life will never be the same without her. I hope to continue to carry out her legacy of telling other's about Jesus. To let her little boys know what kind of women she was and how much she loved them. The last nine months have been grueling to walk through, but they have been life changing--for the better! Erika was not just beautiful on the outside, but the inside as well. Erika's legacy will never be forgotten!

Boy or Girl?

Today is the day that we were able to confirm what the sex of our baby is. I am always on pins and needles when this day arrives. Surprises don't always sit well with me or maybe its just that I get too excited and impatient.

Last month the doctor gave us an idea about what the baby might be and she was right! The Timm Family will be welcoming a baby BOY on April 10th (via C-Section). It's going to be a wild and crazy adventure having three little boys to raise. I am excited to meet this little peanut! This will be the final baby for our family, unless the Lord calls us to adopt one day.

I never pictured myself as a mom to ALL boys. To be honest, it's been a shock to my system. When I first heard the news, last month, I was in denial. I was so sure that this was going to be it; this little baby was going to be my little girl. My pregnancy had felt so different from Logan & Shane's and I was having a lot of the same symptoms as my friends that were having girls. I also knew that the Lord knows my heart and I have dreamt of a daughter since I was a young girl. I even had started her wardrobe! I have all of the websites bookmarked on my computer that I wanted to shop at for when I got the news that it was a girl. I dreamt of all of the girly things we would do together, how I would dress her, how I would raise her to lover herself, Jesus and other's around her. I dreamt of having a work out buddy once she got older and the day that she would get married. I was excited to finally have someone on my side at home, because the boys are always ganging up on me. Basically anything you would dream of, I have dreamt!

I'm not going to lie, I shed a few tears knowing that at this point in my life I will never have a daughter. I'm sure you are thinking that I should just be thankful that I can have children and that I already have 2 healthy boys-- and I am! You see, I am more then thankful for the blessings of my boys. It's a death of my dream, and I need to lay it to rest. I know that God sees the bigger picture and I can be OK with that. I needed to slowly start letting go of that dream and I am thankful I have had this last month to process it.

I have started dreaming about my life with ALL boys and I am excited! I hope that this last one will be a mama's boy, because at this point Josh gets all of the love. I am thankful that I like to do outdoor activities and sports. Hopefully this will help connect me with them once they are older. I pray that with the help of God we will raise men that are respectful, honest, hard-working, kind, compassionate, Godly men. I pray that my boys will want to be friends and have a close relationship.

So there you have it, this concludes a chapter of my life. I will be done bearing children and our family will be of all boys! (At least I don't have to change the title of my blog ;) I am sure I will have some entertaining blog posts in the future!

Josh & I are on the hunt for boy names, if you have any suggestions send them our way!

a divided country...

The Marriage Amendment. This topic has stirred up a lot of feelings inside of me. I have been so upset over the misuse of God's word, my blood pressure has gone through the roof. People are passionate about what they believe in, but some people will twist and turn words to distort the truth. If you don't believe in God's Word or believe that it's not God inspired/God breathed then I don't expect you to believe the same as me. But DON'T use the word of God to debate this topic if you don't understand it. A lot of people have been posting Old Testament verses to support their "NO" vote. These people don't understand the context of the Old Testament or why God had such laws in place for that time. They also don't understand that God sent his one and only Son to earth, to die on the cross for our sins. Because of this selfless sacrifice we have been forgiven and follow the laws of the New Testament.

People have been using the debate that we are all sinners so because of that none of us should have the right to be married. (they are referencing the verses that say homosexuality is a sin.) They are right, we all are sinners but God defined marriage between a woman and a man. It's got nothing to do with what our sin issues are. If God intended us to be married to the same sex, then he would have figured out a way for pro-creation to happen, but it doesn't work that way. Homosexuality has been around from the get go, don't you think God would have said that it was Ok, if HE was OK with it?

I have friends that are gay and I love them. They are people just like you and I. Even though I care about them and love them I'm not going to re-define what God has already defined for us. This doesn't make me a hater nor does it make me intolerant. We will never agree with everyone's choices. I would never treat anyone unkindly based on their sexual orientation. God has called us to love one another.

So, the whole point of this post is to stand up for the Word of God. I know that we all differ on opinion and that's what makes us Americans. I have zero tolerance for people that misuse the Bible. If you want to vote "no" on the marriage amendment, please leave the Bible out of your debate.

Regardless of who you are voting for and if you will fill in the "yes" circle or the "no" circle, YOU NEED TO VOTE. This election is important--they all are. People before us fought long & hard to ensure the right for ALL Americans to vote; regardless of sex, race or color.

I hope that you will exercise your freedom, VOTE--Tuesday, November 6th.

Five Precious Years

The little man that made me a mom turned FIVE last Thursday--Logan Jeffrey! I never could have imagined what it meant loving someone so much until he arrived. (Minus the love for my husband and Jesus) I never knew that kissing hurts, changing diapers, middle of the night feedings, witnessing his love for his little brother, listening to his laugh, teaching him right from wrong, watching him play and learn could be so rewarding.

Logan fits the "first born" mold to a 'T.' He likes to make sure everyone is following the rules, he tries to boss his mom and dad around, cause he already knows so much ;) He makes sure that everyone is happy and is tenderhearted. He loves being outdoors and hunting with his papa's and dad. He still loves to help with projects and thinks the world of his dad. I swear he is part-fish and has the most adorable physique. He is one of the toughest little boys I know, watching him go through all of the tests and seizures from his Epilepsy he has proved himself resilient.

I love how he, mostly, always loves his little brother. He tries to include Shane in activities and teaches him how to do new things. He protects him and loves him so much. Bedtime is my favorite when we pray together as a family and then the exchange of hugs and kisses take place. It looks more like a wrestling match.

Logan is taking a liking to sports--baseball, soccer and wrestling are among his favorites. He also has a love for music---singing, dancing, instruments (he tries). For a long time he thought he was Troy Bolton (Zack Effron) from High School Musical. He would dress like him most days, quote his movie lines and mimic his dance moves and songs.

Logan is a family guy. He loves all of his aunts and uncles and can't wait until the next time he gets to see them again. He has a special relationship with all of his grandparents and his cousins are like brothers to him. Logan loves it when mom goes away for the weekend, so he can have "Guys Weekend." Guys Weekend consists of my darling husband buying all the foods that I wouldn't, watching movies, having bonfires and staying up late!

He loves school. On his first day of pre-school last year, I was concerned that he would have a tough time adjusting. He gave Josh & I hug and waved good-bye and has never looked back. He's independent when he needs to be, but still wants/needs his mom and dad.

I could go on and on about my little man. Logan brings so much joy to our lives and I thank God everyday for giving him to us. Our lives are forever blessed!

I love you all the way to Jesus, buddy!
xox

2+3=5

I made it Facebook official so I thought I better make it blog official...we are expecting baby #3 in April! We are really excited to be adding another little miracle to our family. We had been trying for a few months and when I found out in August that I was pregnant, I was actually in shock. July was  a stressful month since Logan had begun having seizures. We were making trips to the Twin Cities to see  a specialist to figure out what our little guy had. So not to be too graphic, but baby-making wasn't our top priority. I love how God works. I can say that this has been true with all of my pregnancies. Whenever I just let go of controlling when I am going to conceive, the Lord knocks my socks off and I conceive. I guess I just need to be reminded, often, that HIS ways are better then mine!! Kind of humbling!

I found out Sunday, August 5th that I was prego! We were heading home from Gull Lake and on the way home Logan asked me if I had a baby in my tummy--completely out of the blue. At that time I had no idea. When we got home, I took a test. I was waiting for the results to read "negative" so I didn't pay attention to it. (Earlier that week I had taken a test and it read "negative.") Much to my dismay it was POSITIVE!! I was in such a shock that I had to go for a run and couldn't even tell Josh. I had a chat with God and a good laugh--his timing IS perfect. I was trying to think of some cute way to tell Josh, but I couldn't wait. (This really shouldn't be a surprise to anyone.) He was really excited and shocked all the same. I think I made it three weeks without telling anyone cause I still couldn't believe it was true.

This little honey has already ran the Warrior Dash and competed in a Duathalon. I had already registered for the events so I thought I better follow through. It was brutal running in the beginning stages since all I felt like I was going to do was throw up---a big lump just sat in my throat. I am now in the second semester and feeling much better!

This pregnancy has been different then with my boys. I have been getting pimples, my hair hasn't been growing like a weed like it did with them and have had other side effects. I am so thankful to be over the nausea stage. I felt like all I did was eat, if my stomach was empty I was on the verge of throwing up. As much as I don't enjoy the side effects of the first trimester, its reassuring that the baby is still doing ok. It's bitter sweet really.

Last Monday I had a doctor's appointment and was able to have an ultrasound. This baby is wild and crazy, he/she reminded me of a gymnast. We will be finding out the sex of the baby, so hopefully next month it will be 100% confirmed!

Side note...Logan is doing great with his Epilepsy. Since he started his meds in July he hasn't anymore since August--PTL! We go back again in December for another check-up. Erika is home with her family! She is in remission! She is still very tired and has an immune system of an infant, but she is making great strides.

Life feels normal again. Everyone is home and all of the medical issues are under control. It's been so cool to see God's hand on our lives and to see how he has been in control the entire time. I am so thankful for my faith in HIM--he was and still is my sustainer of life.

My "Job" Year...

This year has been a year I will never forget. I can't say it has been my best year nor can I say that I want another year like this. I call 2012 my year of Job (like the book in the Bible). I am writing this post in hopes to digest and process some more tough news my hubby and I received last week.

Our son, Logan, was diagnosed with Epilepsy. He began having seizures in late June and has continued to have more. We were referred to a specialist, Pediatric Neurologist, and he made the diagnosis. I am relieved that we have an answer and tools to treat his epilepsy, but am in shock that my little guy was given this diagnosis. He has been a healthy little boy up until last month.

You just never know when life is going to change (again). My heart hurts for my little peanut when he goes through a seizure. They come out of no where and he doesn't realize what is going on. He usually gets physically hurt when he has them. As a mother, I want to be able to protect him and prevent injury. I pray that as he gets older he will know his body and will be able to sense when they are coming on. I worry about his future, I want him to have a normal childhood and want him to participate in extracurricular activities. I don't want us to live in fear that something could happen, but we still need to be responsible and not set him up for injury. Will he be able to drive? Will I be able to let him go swimming with friends without me? Will he be safe riding bike or climbing trees? Will he still feel like he conquer the world? Are kids going to tease him?

Logan doesn't completely understand the depths of this, and I think that is OK for now. We will have a new norm in our family, and thats going to be going through the checklist of what Logan can and cannot do, when we go somewhere do we have all of the meds with, do the people he is going to be with know how to handle seizures, etc. I pray that the Lord would make me so in tune to him, that my motherly senses and intuitions would be intensified.  I am also praying that the Lord will heal Logan of this condition. I watched him heal my sister-in-law, Erika, from Leukemia, so I know he can heal Logan too. He IS the "Great Physician!"

As I reflect back from last August 2011 to today, July 31st, I have never had to handle/walk through such heavy life situations. (dad died, stepmom battled cancer, sister-in-law diagnosed with cancer, other family health issues, and now Epilepsy) I know that I would have never been able to have maintained peace and joy in the midst of turmoil if it wasn't for my faith in Jesus. HE has been my rock through it all. I don't know how other people go through tough seasons and not know HIM. There is HOPE in Jesus and I cling onto his WORD when life doesn't go the way I have for seen it too (and when it is going smoothly). I am so thankful for all of the amazing people God has placed in my life. They have come alongside me and helped carry my burdens.

Would you be willing to pray for Logan? Would you pray that the Lord would heal him from Epilepsy?

Let me know how I can be praying for you too!!

Below are parts of some song lyrics that feed my soul...

In Christ Alone:
"In Christ alone my hope is found
He is my light, my strength, my song
This cornerstone, this solid ground
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm

What heights of love, what depths of peace
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease
My comforter, my All in All
Here is the love of Christ I stand!"

Our God:
(Logan & I love to sing this song...LOUD!)

chorus:
"Our God is greater
Our God is stronger
God, you are higher then any other
Our God is healer
Awesome in power
Our God, our God

A Weekend of Firsts

This weekend was a weekend of first's for us!

Saturday was the FIRST time since March 16, 2012 that we got to spend time with Erika, Sam & boys in a "normal" setting. We all met up to go swimming at our friend Annie's apartment's outdoor pool. The Rodriguez and Timm family were all thinking the same thing before swimming and ran into each other Target in Minnetonka. My family was at the check out and the Rodriguez'a had just arrived. It brought tears to my eyes seeing Erika there. It would be a place that I would run into Erika. To see her out of the hospital was medicine for my soul! It was so refreshing to see her in her element--being a mom, wife and of course shopping (she is the queen at it!).

We spent the afternoon lounging by the pool, squirting each other with water, snacking on treats and just being together as a family. It was great for the cousins to swim together and just to do life like we used too.

Shane was quite the charmer at the pool. He befriended women 20x his age and kept them engaged in conversation--"My num, num, nums!" "Where's Papa?" "Where's MeMe?" "Where's puppy?" He also tried to walk away with some guys' cooler filled with tasty beverages, but to their advantage the cooler weighed more then he did. He definitely invaded other kid's personal space sitting on the pool steps next to them.

Logan, Ben & Jake are little fish! They had so much fun splashing each other and swimming around. The twin's are growing up so fast. It's so fun to sit and have conversations with them. Ben has taken a special liking to me and I love it!! He gives the best hugs!! Logan was very GQ at the pool with his fedora hat and aviator glasses. He likes to make sure that everyone is sharing and following the rules--It's the first born in him ;)

Sunday was the FIRST time we competed in the Warrior Dash held at the Afton Alps. We had a team of seven. It was a whopping 93F when we ran. If you are wondering what the Warrior Dash is, it's a 5K Obstacle Course run. (warriordash.com) The course was jam packed with hills, people, hills, obstacles, and did I mention hills?! We all wore our "Winning for Erika" t-shirts and did the race in her honor. At the starting line the MC was announcing different groups and he announced ours!! Go Erika!! We all made it through without any serious injuries. Next time when we run it we will not do it at three o' clock in the afternoon.

It is crazy to think about how much Erika has overcome in the past four months with her battle with Leukemia. She is such a strong woman physically and spiritually. Her faith can not be wavered! We are SO proud of her!!

I was craving family time with my boys and extended family this weekend. My love tank is on full again and I am already scouting out the next race I will be doing. (I think it will be the du-athalon put on by Church for the Harvest).

Happy 4th of July weekend!!

Feeling the burn...

Summer is in full swing and I'm loving this warm weather. I'm so energized by the sun, it makes my heart happy!! Since I last wrote I have been working hard on getting back into shape and feeling like myself. I found the most amazing gal that comes to my home Monday's & Friday's so I can go do Boot Camp classes at the YMCA. My work schedule wouldn't allow me to do those classes, so I feel so blessed that I can. There is nothing better then feeling toned and more firm, especially after carrying two beautiful boys! I have been running, too, and it feels so good to have a base down. Running four miles is no longer torturous. My goal by the end of the summer is to run around Lake Le Homme Dieu which is around 10 miles. I used to think that running was the ultimate workout and that my body responded best to it, but I'm now a firm believer in cardio and circuit training. It's amazing how my lungs and heart have stayed in running shape while doing the classes. I run about 3-4x/week and do classes 2x.

At the beginning of the month I ran in the "Go Commando" race which is a 5K obstacle course. The race was held in Stillwater and was SO fun!! A group of us gals ran the race together, I plan on making this an annual event. This Sunday, Josh & I and a group of friends will be running the Warrior Dash which is another 5K Obstacle Course. We are running this in honor of Erika, Josh's sister, who is battling Leukemia--and winning! We had t-shirts made and will be sporting those the day of the event!

I also love how exercise is a common denominator in Josh & I's relationship. We are VERY competitive with each other, which helps us to push each other to the next level. Since I have been able to work out more then Josh, I have been having faster mile splits then him. I love that every time he goes for a run, he's trying to get faster and faster (to beat me). He may not admit to this, but I can see it in his eyes. I'm also looking forward to doing CrossFit with Josh once Sam & Erika come home.

Working out, this Spring, has kept me sane through all of the extra stresses and worries that have come up this past year. 2012 has definitely not been my most favorite year, life has felt really heavy. Thankfully, exercise has been my outlet for when I'm sad, mad, frustrated, worried, etc. Running not only is a stress reliever for me, but it's also my time with the Lord. It's time for me to be reminded that HE is in control of everything and that HE is my source for everything. It has also been a time of repentance and getting my heart right with the Lord. I get caught up in the beauty around me and forgot about "life" for a few moments.

I want to encourage all of you to take control of your health, and do something healthy for you and your family. Our bodies are God's temple and he wants us to use them for his glory. He doesn't want us to become lazy and stagnant. Over and under eating (which, I have been guilty of both) is not honoring to our bodies. Keep moving and you will find that you will have more energy! Set goals for yourself, write it on paper and then tell someone about them. I would love to hear about your fitness stories and what are some of your favorite workouts and classes! Keep feeling the burn!

Assessing...

This week has had me thinking about, well me. I know it's not the "Minnesota Nice" thing to do, but we all need to do some self-reflecting. It helps us to become better people and figure out what is important in life.

Walking with Erika in her battle with Leukemia has caused me to think about my health and what is most important in life. I find myself staring a little longer at my two beautiful boys & husband, holding them a little bit tighter and sneaking in a few extra kisses. Being there for my husband as he watches his sister & only sibling fight for her life has been an emotional roller coaster. I try to have extra grace for his extra fiesty-ness, I making sure to be available emotionally for him, I pray for him and encourage him. I love how manly my man is, I love that if he could, he would take his sister's place, that he would lay his life down for his family & friends. I don't like how hard it is for him to open up; so I just wait for those few moments that he will let me carry his load (I actually pray that he will have those moments). I am so thankful that Jesus wants to help carry our loads too, so that we can find rest in HIM.

 I have also been feeling down about what I have been putting into my body and my lack of exercise. Before Josh & I left for vacation, the first week of April, I was eating well and trying to exercise regularly (Before we found out about Erika). I should know this about myself by now, but I need to exercise on a regular basis. It's my choice drug really (besides my coffee). When I'm not on a normal routine of eating well and exercising regularly it affects all areas of my health. My self-esteem plummets, I'm more tired, I'm less likely to want to be intimate and I probably have my sassy-pants on more often.

I don't know about you, but I am just not an early morning person. My heart wants to be, I dream of all the things I could accomplish if I could get out of bed at 5AM--working out, getting a cup of coffee and sitting in silence and doing my devotions, then getting ready for the day. Right now its just not my reality. Instead, I'm rolling out of bed around 6:50-7AM throwing on some clothes, hurrying to Caribou for a coffee to go, all to make it back by 7:15 for my first little kiddo to arrive.

Tuesday I ate one too many cookies and went to bed at 8PM feeling discouraged about my food choices. Wednesday, on the other hand, was a brand new day! I woke up at 5:45AM feeling refreshed and ready to take on the day. I was able to enjoy my coffee at Caribou and some much needed time with my Savior. I also had an amazing "Ah-Ha" moment. I have been contemplating hiring a personal trainer a couple of times a week. I want to be toned again and would rather run an hour then do strength training. I have decided to have a substitute come two times each week for an hour so I can partake in strength training exercise classes at the YMCA. I went to 'Group Power' yesterday and can barely walk today, but I love that feeling! The other days I can go running outside with my man. I think he is so hot when he runs! He has amazing broad shoulders, the perfect waistline and defined legs!! (He's going to kill me that I just wrote that--it's the truth though!)

I feel excited, renewed, and refreshed about my new workout routine and times with the Lord in the morning. I can be really hard on myself when I don't get work outs in. This is one less battle that I have to fight in my mind. (It's no wonder I can't wake up in the AM.) I'm doing something for myself that will benefit my family and me! When I exercise I make better food choices and don't have to feel like a glutton. I am also going to try to wake up at 6:30AM so I can have my devo time first thing. The past two days I have so enjoyed sipping on my cup of coffee and reading God's word! I think I was feeling like a failed mom and wife because I couldn't get up and accomplish everything I wanted too, but that's Ok that I don't do it in a specific order. I work 50+ hours each week, plus manage my home and try to be the wife, mother, daughter, friend that God has called me to be. Bottom line, for me, is stop comparing!

I challenge you to make some healthy changes in your life. Our bodies are God's temple and he wants us to respect them and take care of them. Also, when is the best time for you to carve out some quiet time with the Lord? Mornings, during nap time or lunch tim, or before bed?

Blown Away!

Today I was feeling a little bit like "Whoa is Me." When I woke up this AM I was feeling discouraged about some things, weary even though I just got back from vacation, and maybe even a little overwhelmed with life. I felt alone, even though I am not, but I have been internalizing a lot. When I went and checked my email during breakfast a friend of mine has messaged me. She had told me she was praying for us and wanted to help. She also coordinates one of the ministries I help out with at church and said she was going to give me a break the next couple of months. I had plan on emailing her this week to let her know that I need a break from serving until things settle down with Erika. I love the Lords timing!!

Later today another friend dropped off a sensory table and a "Green Thumb/Spring" theme of projects that I can do with my daycare kiddos. Lesson planning takes a lot of time and creativity and I haven't had the energy to do a lot of it, this brought me to tears. Now I have one less thing to think about and more time to spend with Erika & her family!

Earlier this week I was talking to Josh about getting a cleaning person to come every other week to the house. Running a business in your home requires a lot of cleaning, and with our new "normal" of life I haven't has as much free time nor the energy. Another friend, TODAY, wanted to do "something" to help us out during this time and asked if she could come clean my house. I felt like my jaw dropped and I started to laugh. I told her what I had expressed to Josh, and how her timing was so perfect. She is coming next week to help me!

The reason I am writing all of this is to share with you that the LORD's timing is perfect!! He hears our cries, he knows our hearts, our desires and needs. He makes himself known at the most amazing times. All of these little angles today have blessed me more then they know. I feel so energized by them and KNOW that THIS battle belongs to the LORD. I think it's so important to be in tune with the Lord's voice; or that prompting you get in your soul that you need to something. It's so cool to see the fruit that comes out of that obedience and how it effects other people's lives for the better. I hadn't expressed any of these needs to these ladies; they approached me!

"...but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."
Isaian 40:30-31

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."
Matthew 11:28

I invite you all to follow my sister-in-law, Erika, and her family on her journey with her fight against Leukemia. She has a Caring Bridge site where they do an amazing job of keeping us up-to-date and how we can pray specifically for them. I have been blown away by Sam & Erika's faith throughout this whole process, their love for one another, and how united they are in their marriage.

Winning for Erika!

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/erikarodriguez

My Little Nutroll!

My Little Nutroll, is another name for my sweet & sassy Shane. I decided that I need to document all of the crazy things he has been up too or I will forget in a couple of months...I blame it on my "mom" brain!

1) Shane LOVES the water. It doesn't matter if it's the dog's water dish, the toilet, bath, pool he will be in it. Some funny water moments have been watching Shane drink like a puppy out of Hunter's water dish while Hunter eats his food. He also thinks that he needs to immerse his face into the dish. I have caught Shane on a weekly basis throwing his nuks, books, and toys in the toilets. He also loves to take logan's cup and drink the toilet water. Our toothbrushes have been victim to being dunked in the toilet and then sucked on by our little Poopsie! He has no fear in the pool. He thinks he can swim like Logan, so you can not take your eyes off of him.

2) He loves Hunter! Hunter is our 7 year old chocolate lab. When Shane wakes up in the AM he typically asks for "puppy." Hunter and Shane swap saliva on a daily basis. Shane loves to snuggle with hunter, lay on him, jump on him, and go for rides on him. If he is sad and we mention the word "puppy" it immediately calms him down. Hunter brings joy to Shane's life!

3) Shane is my daycare bully....right now. I know I shouldn't label him, but he is in a phase. He's learning boundaries and the concept of kind hands. Shane is no stranger to time out. As soon as he has broken a rule he instantly points to the time out wall. He loves to steal the kid's nuks or blankets and take off running with them, all the while he still has one in his mouth and one in his hand. When changing diapers, he loves to tower over the kids and wait for the perfect moment to belly flop on them. Thankfully I am on to his ways and can intervene. He is learning how to share and occasionally hits for no reason.

4) Despite Shane's sassy side, he is one of the favorites of the daycare kids. Yesterday when he was at "Naughty Boy Tuesday" the kids were wishing he was home. He has a sweet side and his personality is contagious. In my opinion, it's hard not too love him. His smile melts you and he exudes joy! He is also a dancing machine!

5) He still adores his older brother. At times I think he is already seeking Logan's approval. He loves to sneak into his room and play with all of his toys. Logan, however, is not so fond of this, but still thinks its an awesome idea for them to share a room. (I think Logan is more excited for bunk beds!) He wants to sit on the stools at meal time just like Logan. He cries when he doesn't get to go where his big brother goes.

Check 1, 2, 3...Check

Don't worry I won't burst out into song or rap for that matter; I just wanted to check in! I had great intentions when I first created this blog, like posting weekly, but life always gets in the way. There have been many times when I would be thinking about a blog post or be in a moment that should have been blogged, but life has kept me distracted! I don't have anything too exciting to share but thought if I started typing that this would turn into a purposeful post.

One thing that has been on my mind is how thankful I am. To make it more specific, how thankful I am for my business. God continues to blow my socks off. I have to give him all of the credit for blessing me with amazing families all the way down to my business name--Agape Kids. From the first day I was an official daycare provider to now three years later, the Lord has provided over and beyond what I imagined. Every time there has been a change to a families schedule or kiddos going off to school, the Lord always provides me a new family to fill in the gaps. For instance, a few weeks ago I decided that I should try to add a couple more kids to my daycare. I had lost 2.5 to Kindergarten and never filled their spaces. I began praying on a Monday and by Friday someone had emailed me about daycare. The next week I was speaking with a friend and lead me to another family looking for daycare. Wow, I serve an awesome God! I'm really excited to have these new kiddos start!

As I type away, Shane is talking away in his bedroom--he's supposed to be sleeping. This last month he's nap schedule has been so off. I can't quite figure him out. He typically naps two times a day (totaling 3-4 hrs) and is in bed around 7-7:30PM. This month he will either refuse to nap completely, or not nap in the AM and barely sleep in the PM, or nap in the AM and sleep a little in the PM, or he will nap like a champ both times and once he only napped in the PM but slept decent. If he doesn't sleep in the AM, he is crabby and if he doesn't nap in the PM he is crabby. If I don't get him to sleep by 730 he is crabby. His behavior would lead me to believe that he still needs two naps and an early bedtime. Any suggestions/tips would be great!

Pin It!

I have officially caught the bug--the Pinterest Bug!! The New Year and warm weather has got me in decorating mode. I know it's only January, but I already have "spring fever!" This could be a good or bad thing. I've been dusting, organizing and dreaming of how I want to redecorate our home. I love that Pinterest allows me to save all of my finds on one website instead of over crowding my bookmarks on my computer. What a concept, it's brilliant really!

At night I find myself "pinning" ideas for our bedroom and what my dream kitchen would be. Josh and I have started the Dave Ramsey budget/lifestyle so there is a special fund set aside to re-decorate our room. I've always envisioned our bedroom being a sanctuary, a place that I could retreat too and leave my worries and stresses at the door. This, however, is not the case. Our bedroom is my least favorite room in the house, but I plan to change that this year.

Look forward to future blogs, when the re-decorating begins! What are your favorite ideas/pictures to pin?